The pre-app is done!!!!

Wohoo! Finally the adoption pre-app is done. Well the actual pre-application was done a week ago. This is the testimony, statement of faith that goes with it. It sounds bad but getting it done was hard. Mainly because it was very stressful emotionally and just making yourself set aside time to do so. So hopefully we will know something within two weeks! Now it's time to pray, pray, and pray some more that we are accepted!

My dad told me when I got married..."Ashley, you used to never spend money. You saved everything. What's up now? You don't want a car! You NEED a car! Save some of the money from the wedding for a car." Well daddy would be proud. My cheapskate-ness has come back. Big time. Nothing like saving for an adoption to make you a tightwad. I don't wanna spend nothing. Getting stuff for the start back to school last night and had to get a belt and didn't wanna spend so much money... tried to put the belt back and Jimmy went... some things can't be helped.. you HAVE to have one! I don't want to spend more than I have to. Went back to school shopping on the tax free days and I wouldn't by ANYTHING that wasn't 70% off or more. I bought over 200 dollars worth of clothing for 60. Yeah it's back in a major way. I want to save every penny we have for it.

Which makes me stress. I stress about the money I spend, or the money I need to spend, I stress over whether or not we will even make it through the application process. Will we be chosen. Will I be a good mother? Yeah I have been stressing bad. Then I stressed because I forgot that I had Sunday School and wasn't ready. And boy does God put things right in front of us when we need it. The Sunday School lesson was on how Jesus came to earth as a baby and grew up and that though He was God... he was also man. He needed the same things we need and dealt with the same temptations that we deal with. I know God understands my pain, but sometimes I forget that although He is diving and perfect, He really has been there. He came to earth for that very reason, to be the perfect judge because He has been tempted. Even He in the Garden of Gethsemane asked God to remove the cup from Him. But then He followed up with "Not My will but Thine be done." I think a lot of times we see God as the perfect Human. God with the body of a man. Not as someone who cried the same tears we do. Who asked God to change our circumstances. But as Louie Giglio says..."The cross is not proof that God will change the circumstances, He didn't change them for Jesus on Calvary. The cross is proof that God will see us THROUGH the circumstances." Oh thank God for the cross and to know I'm not walking this alone.